Welcome

This blog reflects ideas I've stumbled upon in my executive coaching practice helping clients deal with opportunities and problems.

Straight and Narrow

It’s a biblical admonition. Essentially find the small gate and the narrow path that leads to what you want.

That seems like something we can use in many aspects of our lives. Don’t need to be religious. Just thoughtful.

I often say to my clients “let’s find out how to do more of the right stuff and less of the wrong stuff”. So in coaching it’s a two part program. First, strategy; what’s the right stuff? Secondly, discipline; just do the right stuff.

Often it’s harder to avoid what’s wrong than it is to focus on what’s right. In marketing, for example, it seems people love the notion of trying a new unproven scheme rather than renewing focus on what’s been determined to be right.

Posted by Jerome Shore

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20 June 2015 ~ Comment

Executive Function in Time Management

I recently spoke to a client about Executive Function for individual performance. There is an increasing need for executive function because of all the distractions people now face at work via social media and email. Executive function can be described as the controlling and initiating ways we set the stage to do our work.

One way I work with clients around executive function is the day part school schedule. First period is getting your assistant, if you have one, focused for the day. Second period is focus on personal work alone. Third period is lunch reserved for relationship building. Fourth period is clearing accumulated emails and vmails. Fifth period is focusing your assistant for the afternoon. Sixth period is working with others in meetings [e.g. delegating, checking in, organizing]. Obviously this won’t work everyday but if it is done on days when it is possible it is great.

Checklists, calendars, milestone check-ins and preset routines are aspects of executive function that could be used in delegation.

The right way to deal with performance issues

My coaching clients often have to deal with a performance issue for one of their employees. Here’s a good paradigm for that.

When a performance issue appears you want to discover if

a] the employee is aware of the problem, agrees it is a problem and knows what good performance looks like, b] if they get it that a problem exists do they have the right motivation to do something about it and c] if they are motivated do they have the know-how or skills to fix the problem.

When you know the all of the above you can then attack the problem correctly. Most often you’ll have to work on skills or motivation or some other attitude. But there will be times when the employee just needs to know you’re serious about them getting right it. And there may even be time when something in their working conditions will have to change.

What sense does it make to complain

While reading this wonderful book I came across this quote which attracted my attention.

“People make a great mistake when they never complain. Whatever they gain by patience they lose in honesty. Conversations begin to ring false. Suspicions are aroused. Resentments multiply. Relationships are poisoned.”

It’s a great summary of the reasons to be assertive. When people don’t complain it means they are not assertive. And that means they’re either endlessly passive or graduate to aggressive when they boil over from not getting what they want. It’s a lot more than complaining, of course. There are many reasons to speak up.

So what are your opportunities to speak up assertively. Complaining is one alternative. Not asking for a raise is another common way people are passive at work. Being clear about personal needs is sometimes avoided and usually unnecessarily so. Getting angry is a way people are aggressive after being passive too long while not being assertive.

Think about the ways you could benefit from being more assertive and get on with it.

Posted by Jerome Shore

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18 March 2015 ~ Comment

What are the goals of your goals?

Plotinus, the philosopher, is thought to have said that “if a man seeks the good life for any reason outside itself, it is not the good life he seeks”. I interpret this to mean that eventually our goals have to devolve to be about ourselves. It’s nice to say I want to earn one million dollars this year but better to know how you’ll use the cash to better your life – or the life of someone else.

Sales people in hard markets, like real estate and insurance, where lots of cold calls are needed must be motivated to do the hard work of all the cold contact. They are the kind of people who need to know their real rewards. It often isn’t worth earning more money if you’re not going to enjoy it. So they might actually go to the trouble of keeping a diary of what they want i.e. what they’d buy with money they earn. Keeping a diary with good descriptions of ‘the goals of your goals’ can be very motivating. Sample entry: I want a BMW X6 with the big engine, the complete winter package, the new audio package and I want it in yellow. It’s not unknown for salespeople to buy things they can’t afford to motivate them so they can make the payments.

Posted by Jerome Shore

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11 March 2015 ~ Comment

Petition Yourself With Prayer

I’m reading a wonderful novel where the main character is a Bishop in the Church of England. It’s got me thinking about prayer which is something I’ve never thought about before, except to avoid it.

I’ve discovered that one the many types of prayer is to petition God for something you want. For example, “God, please end war.” or “God, grant me the courage to face up to my fear of public speaking.”

The first of those two examples is something totally out of the petitioner’s control. The second of the two examples is something the petitioner can participate in by learning about where courage comes from and techniques to face difficulties. I’ve often thought that people who say a petition prayer like the second example before they go to sleep might engage their subconscious to work on the subject while they sleep.

I have a client right now who has a big need to ‘let go’ of the effect another person’s personality has on them. My client’s prayer could be “please help me find the shield to ignore x’s behavior, to just let it pass like a ship in the night.” Developing that prayer and repeating it when needed could be a powerful reminder to my client of what she must do. It will certainly augment the coaching discussion we had.

Can you think of a petition prayer you might be able to use effectively for yourself? I’ll be interested to hear any of your good ideas.

Posted by Jerome Shore

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15 January 2015 ~ Comment

Get what it’s like to be them

An executive coach needs empathy to see the world as their client’s do. It’s not just “do this, do that”.

Behavioral ecologist Jakob von Uexküll invented the notion that while our immediate environment is what it is – each of us sees and senses it differently depending on many factors, physical and psychological intertwined, not surprisingly.

Take the example of a woman walking her dog on a downtown street. While the woman will notice and react to things that interest and confront her; people, store windows, hazards in her path. The dog, differently, will revel in the wide variety of smells on fire hydrants, coming from restaurant exhausts and emanating from the sidewalk. Each could be floating in their own ‘bubble’ along the sidewalk one above the other.

This notion of seeing the world as if you’re in a different ‘bubble’ also helps hunters. Imagine hunting a bear thru a forest. It would be best to get in the bear’s head; understanding how they think and react to every stimulus. That would certainly be better than using your own experiences to judge what the bear will do. Likewise a coach who helps a client based on their, the coach’s, experiences, is not doing it right.

So I’m motivated to understand what my client is feeling. I want to know what makes them confident, scared, anxious, happy, etc. etc. etc. It’s hard and rewarding work. You can try it in many conversations you have.

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